Last Updated: 8/26/06

The Project has been completed! Most tracks will be taken down within the next couple of weeks and will only be available on the cd!

Q: What is the Very Tiny Songs Project?

A: The Very Tiny Songs Project is just what it seems. During this project, I produced very tiny songs based on suggestions to me that I received via enail, telephony, private conversation, telegraphy, or other communication over the week from May 28th to June 06th, 2006. The songs are posted on this page in the order in which they were produced. That order is based on the order in which the suggestions were received.

Q: Why did you do this? Why, in the name of all that is pure and decent? Why?

A: Because I wanted to get back into writing songs after my long hiatus from recording, and I figured it would be fun to write very tiny songs for the people who have been kind enough to stick by me. Calm down.

Q: Are these songs any good?

A: You be the judge of that. I did these all spontaneously, quickly, crappily, and cheaply. First takes, mistakes, bad notes, and poor musicianship were all allowed. These are song ideas--sketches. Had to get my practice in.

Q: May I make a song suggestion?

A: No.

Q: How much longer will this project be going?

A: It's finished! The next phase involves turning the whole thing into a cd with artwork, lyrics and an extra song. When that is available, it will be here on my website for sale. I will also take down the majority of the songs in order to save traffic and space.

Q: Where should one look for the finished songs?

A: Below.

Click the Song Titles to download the .mp3s.

All songs copyright 2006, Plastic Snowman Songs (ASCAP).

1. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern

2. Peasprout and the Little Baby Chick

3. Salad Days of the Vegetáles

4. Bonebeard, the Dinosaur Pirate from Space

5. Kick It Into High Gear

6. Infinite Tube of Toothpaste

7. Damn the Cancer

8. Global Warming (Is a Lie)

9. If I Were A Pangolin

10. The Ant and the Block of Cheese

11. Susan

12. Ambassador Robert W. Fitts

13. Underwater Basket Weaving

14. Michael Is the President of the English Club

15. Trapped In the Stomach of a Giant

16. What Will Laura Be When She Grows Up?

17. Invisible Shadows

18. Jen and Her Dog, Elvis

19. Snake Babies

20. Dr. Jekyll's Toothbrush

21. Riley Raccoon

22. Unicorns

23. Noelle Loves Shakespeare

24. Glass Pop Bottles

25. The Periodic Table of the Elements

26. We Are Fire Ants

27. The Mischievous Elves of Iceland

28. What It's Like In Japan

29. The Nature Kitty Nature Show

30. Spherical Dice

31. Contents Unknown

32. Lamentations on a Theme of Bubba's Secret

33. I Have An Extra Head

34. Osmosis

35. Gentoo Penguins

36. Schweepies

37. Ultimate Frisbee

38. Gelatin

39. Cecil, the Cantankerous Turtle

40. Demonic Lizards

41. My Name Is Matlock

42. He Didn't Like Caddyshack

43. Pink Lemons

44. Mr. T

45. The Girl Who Liked Baseball

46. Bryan Fernando Is Awesome

47. Lemmings Will Do Whatever

48. 12 Little Kittens (and Their Journeys Through Math and Science)

49. Serving Size

50. The Tale of Raskolnikov and Marty McFly

51. Love Is a Cyborg Playing the Harpsichord

52. Daisy Is Dead

53. Tab Cola

54. Substrates Plus Enzymes Equals Love

55. The Golden Goldfish

56. The No-Name Man (With No Name)

57. When Good Kiwis Go Bad

58. VCR Repairman

59. The Forests Are Plotting Their Revenge

60. Dr. Awkward

61. ¡Villalpando!

62. Igor Sikorski and the Helicopter

63. Monty the Tree

64. Wimps vs. Machos

65. A Syrup Bottle Shaped Like Me

66. Frogmasterman

67. A Bad Day For the Gangster-Operated Mom-and-Pop Shop

68. Gum

69. The Tiniest Dog In the World

70. Internal Banana Farm

71. Lost in LOST

72. The Ice Cream Man With the Bulgy Eye

73. Vanilla's Love Life

74. Super Duper Smile Salesmen

75. The Villain Who Wears No Pants

76. The Toaster Who Climbed A Hill Only to Find He Was Already On the Other Side

77. Asian Afro

78. James Wrote A Song About Me

79. Melissa June, The Beautiful Deer

80. The Ballad of William Archibald Spooner